There has been a long, violent, rather controversial battle between men and women over the last year.. regarding WHO is the trash-est. Who is (and I quote my friend Leila Doyle here when I say) the BIN JUICE of the sexes!
I was given the idea to compare how trash each gender really is from people’s experiences, (I won’t use names for privacy purposes) to figure out… WHO is the trash-est of them all.
If you’re not in the know, and you have no idea what this is about- let me explain… in 2017 there was a rise in the TRASH phrase ‘all men are trash’ and the TRASH backlash phase ‘all women are trash’ to describe the nasty, antics of human beings in relationships/in the talking phase and so on and so on.
So get out your popcorn, settle down and lets do some battling…
IN THE RIGHT CORNER WE HAVE GIRL A:
I met this guy, last year in my first year at university, and we hit it off really fast, he was great and I thought actually maybe we’d become something really long term and cute! Like… he said all the right things, we seemed to be so, so similar and I really fell for him and I thought he had really fallen for me to! But it seemed that when his girlfriend, OF 2 YEARS that he just forgot to tell me about, from home turned up at his flat while I was there for a movie night, all of that crumbled and it was so shit. They’re still together today, so to be fair, it makes both men and women trash.. but mainly men.
AND IN THE LEFT CORNER WE HAVE BOY B:
So there was this girl who I was talking to, met her through a friend, and she was actually unreal. I’m talking pengest of the pengest. I met her, took her out for a really nice meal, after a couple of dates I started telling my boys about her,thought it was getting really serious and wanted to ask her to be my girl. Only to be completely cut off, like no explanations. nothing. she just disappeared.I don’t let my guard down that easily, and I was hurt because she just went after I actually let it down.
BACK IN THE GIRLS CORNER, GIRL C:
Every girl I have come across has seems to have had one like it, or knows someone who has had one of these scenarios… but my boyfriend, ha not anymore, got another girl pregnant! But I know people have come across similary situations like when the guys got a child and hasn’t said anything or when the baby daddy runs away and says nothing… or when its your dad that did the runner… they’re all shit really to be fair…
AND TO THE BOYS IN THE LEFT, BOY D:
looool Maya you know full well everyone is trash…. my relationship with *girl* was shambles. As if we weren’t together for a year and a half and she broke up with me for my best mate…
I’m not going to lie, I received a fair share of trash men and women stories, but just because these people ARE undoubtedly trash and need a couple of lessons on how to treat their future partners, it doesn’t meant that this needs to be generalised to the rest of their gender. There are good, mature minded people who you might not even give the chance because as you say ‘all men are trash’ or ‘all women are trash’. But since when is everyone perfect? Since when do people not make mistakes- maybe sometimes it’s purposeful but those people are just rubbish. Trash is a term I use very lightly and I use it all the time before anyone points that out.
I also did an Instagram poll… (yes winning the game!#trash) and it was a 60% for ‘men are trash’ and 40% for ‘women are trash’, however this was undeniably biased, minus a few people, in that ALL the females who voted, voted for ‘Men are trash’ and some males also voted for men are trash, and the majority of people who voted for ‘Women are trash’ were male.
What is it with people in this day and age? Are we so self conscious that we can no longer even try to open up to a person anymore because of the actions of someone else. Don’t get me wrong, I have had my fair share of hurts, I have come across some idiots in my life time, and I have allowed it to affect how I respond to other guys, and at times I can struggle with opening up, but I, more often than not, put that down to other things rather than past relationships/near relationships… but I now realise that actually maybe instead of past me trying to start something new with someone else I should have allowed myself to heal properly, and remember that not all guys are the same.
We are all filled with this pent-up anger towards some undeniably rubbish situations in the past that we automatically apply it, and how we responded, to every similar situation we come across, this in psychological terms would be called mental set. Approaching a situation in a particular way because it worked last time. AGAIN this is where I feel I should emphasise that that situation is probably still hurting you; that’s completely okay! But don’t take this anger and these emotions out on someone who may not actually have the same intentions as the previous, because its not fair. Sometimes give other people a chance. Similarly, sometimes allow yourself some time for you.
Us humans are social animals, and we CRAVE affection and attention, we also avoid AT ALL COSTS the feelings of rejection and pain. Rejection isn’t fun, and I feel like we try to cover the emotions we get from rejection as we scream men/women are trash from every roof top we stand on. But at the end of the day, what is the point in constantly putting each other down! Where is that getting us?! You can’t blame a WHOLE group of same gendered people just because of the one man or one woman that broke your heart.
I also feel like the way we as a society perceive the sexes, where women HAVE to be curvy and almost unachievable body type and physical look, be rich, have a degree and the latest fashion and men have to be hench, have a steady high income, have to take girls out- which influenced the rise of the ‘finesse chick’, have to pay. We have to have certain aspects about us, we have to do certain things or we’ll be immediately deemed as trash.
THIS. IS. LIFE. PEOPLE. Everyone is going to have their fair share of heart breaks, and hurts, and what the f***(my grandparents read this blog) moments, when it comes to relationships, before we finally settle down. Best believe when you do ‘settle down’ all men won’t be trash and all women won’t be trash. Even when you’re in a relationship, not all men/women are trash. Like you don’t have men and/or women in your family… stop making these SWEEEEPING statements.
At the end of the day, we are either all trash OR nobody is trash, I prefer the latter. People live and they learn, unfortunately, life isn’t perfect. We are young, and we all make mistakes, we learn from these mistakes no matter how ‘trashy’ these mistakes are. Sometimes let it go, because they clearly weren’t the one for you! Please, please, please don’t generalise, what one person has done to you, to a whole gender! Lets focus on healing from the hurt we go through and learning more from life before we move on to the next guy/girl.
Safe to say there is one overall winner of this battle. And that is actually yes some people are TRASH, and the things they do are almost horrendous and you can hardly understand how or why they would do that. But it is unfair, and frankly impossible to even attempt to make that statement relevant to a whole gender. It’s also risky, because if we tell ourselves something enough times, eventually we start believing it… meaning that eventually you’ll be under the impression that all men/women are always trash and you’ll end up living in a one bedroom flat with 12 cats.
These ‘trends’ are getting childish. We need to raise each other up as a generation, not put each other down.
But please if you’ve got nothing good to say in the comments, don’t say it.